Front teeth, for example. She has both, this year. And while there are still holes in her smile, the biggest ones are filled. She's got longer skirts, shorter hair, bigger backpacks, smaller pencils. An air of confidence surrounds her--it comes with knowing and being known. And without her nervous stage mom hovering around, she's spreading her wings and taking flight, mostly in large circles around the playground.
It's quiet here this afternoon, although her brother is doing his best to fill the space with the voice that comes out of hiding whenever "Sissy" is away. I take a moment to reflect on the changes, but not too long. My own confidence is still too fresh to linger here, in the place between the now and the not yet.
My daughter is taking yet another step closer to the edge of the nest. I will try not to hold my breath. A year ago, I'd have passed out. Today, I inhale and exhale, and send up a prayer that her wings will be strong.
2 comments:
Oh, what a cutie. Don't the first graders THIS year look itty bitty? Sometimes I think that most all of our parenting is about that fragile here but not yet in our kids' lives. We're always holding on to them as they ARE, but moment by moment, they're changing into what they will be. And all the seeds we plant in the now that we hope will take root and grow abundantly in their futures...we start next week!
They DO!!! And the 2nd graders look so OLD! How did this happen?
I agree with your comment--there is so much of the past/present/future in every bit of what we do. I can never seem to just be in the "now," as is the popular notion currently. Because right NOW, she is two, seven-and-a-half, and sixteen--all at once. I can see it plain as day. How do other people not see that?
Reading Steady But Trembling currently, btw. LOVE IT.
I'll be praying that your start goes well, as well!
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